Tuesday, September 13, 2005

 

My Sartorial Creed

I don't
1. Wear an Ascot
2. Do plaid, checks or paisleys
3. Buy what is necessarily in fashion simply because it is in fashion
4. Have an opinion on whether organic or free-range cotton makes a better t-shirt
5. Mind wearing leather
6. Ever want to iron anything
7. Think that silk underwear is practical
8. Think men should have spend more than 7 to 10 minutes total shaving and combing their hair every morning
9. Think that cowboy boots are passe.
10. Wear Birkenstocks
11. Think socks with sandals are ok in cold weather

I do think
1. I look better in dark colors
2. Silk shirts are better than cotton
3. That bell bottom pants are, unless they are used as naval uniforms, stupid
4. That the waist line on most fashionable pants for women are obsene
5. Fat women shouldn't wear bikini's
6. Fat men shouldn't wear speedo's
7. That most fashion designers of women's clothing are the spawn of Satan or convicted sex offenders
8 Those who design men's fashions are worse than the ones who design women's fashions
9. That t-shirts look best when they are 4 sizes to big
10. That guys who wear saggy pants are idiots
11. Ball caps should always be worn with the bill facing forward

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